Post 106: Baby Steps
Things are getting a bit better as I am digging myself out of a rut of bleh. Not sure if it is “depression” or just a part of normal human experience. The good news is, that after a week of the ceiling having plastic on it, people are coming today ….tomorrow….and Friday, apparently. I had to reach out to the Property Management (which, they are pretty damn stellar if I am being honest) to nudge them on getting to it. Turns out the owner of the house had already approved it and it was the contractor side that was lacking. In any case, the guys that came over to tear the ceiling down did a really good job. I did not hear them take it down at all….no banging. Nothing. Though they had that drier on the whole time.
We also got a notice asking about signing on for another year to the house, so we did same day. We really like this place. I wish it was a little closer to nature and stuff….but if Sacramento and that area is not really all that far, sounds like that may be an option. :) I guess if I think about it, it takes me about that long if I am coming in from Tokyo….I just don’t have to switch stations. If I think of it in those terms, it makes it not so bad at all. :) I mean, it takes my mom 20-30 min just to get to Mill Hollow. Anyway, it looks like this new rental contract does not have a price increase, which I really hope is true. Mainly because the whole Covid thing was putting a lot of people out. My friend who rents too is getting a $125 increase on hers. They tried charging both monthly AND a steep pet fee annually for her dogs. She has a 1 year old too, paying for day care and all that. Oh man….that is rough.
A couple nights ago, I ended up scrolling and watching a video from Youtube about getting out of a rut. Perfect timing. There are sometimes when I am not mad at big brother.
A big part of it is Internal Improvement over External Improvement. Instead of buying things, think of what you can do internally that can get you to that point. If you want to feel better or need a small distraction to clear your head, instead of buying a chocolate bar, go for a walk. They can be short or long term.
The videos are helping me confirm for myself what I am doing (just mindlessly scrolling through social media and feeling mighty difficulty to do things. Plus when I start to do things and they are not turning out how I planned or I expected on instagram, then it gets disheartening. I want to separate myself to thinking that my hobbies need to make money. This one is taking time…but I liken it to how I do not show or do any weight shit (including wins) online. Because if losing weight….or rather developing healthy habits like daily exercise and eating “intuitively” between 8:30am to 7:30pm, is truly something FOR ME, then I should not need to search for validation online or with anyone to “be proud of me”. Do I want people to be proud of me? Fuck yes. Who doesn’t?! But if I choose the path of relying on people being proud of me, I get bored or discouraged if at one point I post something and it gets little to no likes….others become resentful as well, because I am “showing off”. So, If I am seeking to have someone be proud of me, why not just me? I’m important to myself, too. BTW, this goes with positive AND negative comments. I need to treat those the same to keep a balance of some sort. Does not mean I can’t feel good about the positive feedback…just don’t LIVE there. Just like I would not want to live in the sadness of the negative comments.
So right now, this week I am working on 2 things:
consistency
waking up at 6:30 and doing something small until 7:20
Then exercising. I have 4 exercise choices for the day to choose from ranging from 10-20 min.
JUST SHOW UP
eating and exercising based on cycle - it’s a bit of an experiment.
This I had heard on an Obese to Beast video. It was an interesting analysis.
Women tend to be stronger as they are ovulating. Weaker on their period….so I am going to to take advantage of that. During ovulation: exercise hard and eat really well. Once off ovulation, still eat well, and not so aggressive on exercising. During period, light exercise, continue good eating, but allow a little more treats. I don’t have a binge issue, so it is something that I can do.
Here is how Tucker feels about all that:
As we were cleaning and cutting up boxes….Tucker fell in love with this one.
So this weekend, I will be putting my furniture back to the front room and doing more decorating with the cafe area. I decided I am going to reorganize the front room….and am excited about that.
I am also excited about going to Sacramento this weekend to the Japanese store. We are going to walk around the park nearby too. :)
When I went to Safeway yesterday (I noticed this over the weekend too), they had taken almost all the stickers off of the ground telling people which direction they should go or where they should stand to social distance. Yesterday though I did not see the “must wear masks” sign in the left side door. Everyone was wearing masks, but I was like….wow….ok…things are going back to….normal?
There was a leadership meeting at work yesterday…I wonder if some of that is to go back to the office. I am 50/50 excited about that. more on the positive for the work/home balance thing. But my husband is going to be like this probably until summer next year. He is not fairing super awesome in this. He sleeps all weekend. I hope going out to Sacramento will help.
OH one last thing….most of my indoor plants died…I will replant the roots, but I bought some fake flowers to decorate the cafe area. That is my morning crafty thing.